Only Making Us Stronger
by LostFan4life
Summary: Sequel to New Beginnings. After tragedy strikes, Kate starts to fall into a downward spiral and Jack must help her get through it. But can he save her before it's too late? Last Chapter is up!
1. Chapter 1

Only Making Us Stronger

Authors note: I don't own Lost. Here is the sequel to New Beginnings; you should read it before reading this if you haven't already. This story takes place Two years later.

Prologue

It had been two years since the wedding, and the birth of their beautiful daughter Claire, yet it only seemed like yesterday to them. The Wedding was a small ceremony; it was on the beach in front of the sunset. Sun, Sayid, Hurley, Desmond, and Penny had all come to join the celebration. It was the best day of their life other than the birth of Claire.

Aaron was now five years old and today had been his first day of school, since he arrived home he had not stopped talking about all of his new friends and how much fun he had. He told Kate everything he did and he made sure he didn't leave anything out, he even went as far as telling her what he had for lunch.

Claire was now two years old and she was the spinning image of Kate, she had a head full of curly brown hair and a nose as cut as a button. She was daddy's little princess, Jack did everything for her, he would buy her any toy she wanted and he always had the hardest time telling her no.

Kate was now patiently waiting for Jack to return home, she had big news to tell him and she had been thinking all day about how to tell him that he was going to be a father again. It was not planned, but Kate knew that he would be happy, he had already been hinting about wanting another baby.

It was almost six when she heard his car pull in the driveway; this was it the moment she had been waiting for all day.

"Hey, I'm home," Jack yelled as he walked through the door.

"Hey, I'm glad you are home, we need to talk," she said trying not to let him see how nervous she was.

"What is going on?" he asked, "Is something wrong with the kids?" Are you okay?"

"The kids are fine," she replied, "but I think you should sit down."

"Kate, what's going on?" he asked her as he started to get worried. "What's wrong?"

"Well I went to the doctor today and-," she began.

"And what?" he asked with fear in his eyes.

"And we are going to have another baby!" She exclaimed.

"That is great!" he replied.

"Are you happy about this?" She asked hoping that he wasn't just acting for her sake.

"Of course I am." He answered, "How could I not be?" "We are going to have a baby!"

"For a minute, I thought you weren't happy." She said.

"I was just shocked, we just haven't really talked about this." He replied, "But I couldn't be happier about it."

They spent the rest of the night talking about the baby and telling the kids that they would be getting a baby brother or sister soon.

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Authors note: I promise that the rest of the chapters will be longer. I hope you like this chapter, big drama is coming and things are going to start to fall apart. Please review and let me know what you think.


	2. Vacation of Troubles

Vacation of Troubles

Authors note: Hopefully you won't be to mad at me for what happens in this chapter. I don't own Lost.

It had been a month since Kate told Jack the good news, and Jack couldn't be more excited. He couldn't wait to hold the new bundle of joy they would welcome in eight months. To celebrate the news Jack decided that the family should go on vacation, nothing big just a trip to the mountains to relax for the weekend.

"Kate, are you almost ready to go?" He asked her.

"Almost, I just have to finishing packing Claire's stuff and then we can go," she replied.

Five minutes late she came out of the bedroom lugging a large suitcase, with Claire balanced on her hip.

"Kate, what are you doing?" He asked her, "You shouldn't be carrying anything heavy."

"Would you calm down, I'm fine," she assured him.

"No, you don't need to be doing that," he told her, "Here let me take it." He said as he took the large suitcase from her hands.

"Jack, you shouldn't worry about me," she said, "I'm fine, I am fully capable of carrying a suitcase."

"Kate, please don't argue with me," he said, "I'm the doctor and I know what is best for you."

"Why do you need this much stuff anyway?" He questioned noticing the three other suitcases waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs.

"Unlike you, I don't wake up beautiful," she joked.

"You don't need all of this to make you beautiful Kate," he said being completely serious. "You are beautiful just the way you are."

"Nice try," she said, "but we are taking all the suitcases."

"Fine," he said giving into her once again.

After ten minutes of trying to fit all the suitcases in their van, they were finally ready for the four hour drive they had ahead of them. Once they made sure the kids were buckled in and they had their toys in hand, they pulled out of the driveway and onto the road.

Two hours into the drive Aaron and Claire were both sound asleep, Kate hadn't given them a nap so that they would sleep on the way there. Kate was also starting to feel a little bit tired; she had been so busy that she hadn't sat sown all day.

"Kate, maybe you should rest," Jack said to her after seeing how tired she looked.

"I'm fine," she said starting to get annoyed with how overprotective he was being.

"Did you rest at all today?" He asked already knowing the answer.

"I didn't have time," she replied, "I had to clean the house and pack."

"I know you don't want to hear it, but I really think that you should slow down," he said, "this isn't good for you or the baby."

"Fine I will slow down, if you will chill out," she said hoping he would drop the subject.

"Okay, I will chill," he replied, "One more thing," he continued.

"What?" She said slightly annoyed.

"Did you eat enough today?" He asked her. "You are eating for two you know."

"If I take a nap will you shut up?" She asked him.

"Yes, I knew if I kept this up you would do what I wanted you." He answered her.

"What is it with you doctors?" she questioned, "You always think you know what is best for everyone."

"I don't know what is best for everyone, just you." He laughed.

"I hate you," she said with a smile.

"Love you too," he grinned.

It didn't take her long to doze off, she was so tired she could have fall asleep anywhere. Jack couldn't help but look at her, she was so beautiful when she was asleep, so peaceful looking. He couldn't believe that he was this lucky, he had a beautiful wife, two wonderful kids with another on the way; his life was perfect.

It took them another hour and a half to reach their hotel, and by the time the finally arrived it was after eleven o'clock.

"Kate, we're here," he said softly trying to wake her up.

Her eyes fluttered open and a smile appeared on her face.

"You were right about me needing to get some sleep," she told him.

"That is because doctor knows best," he said with a laugh. "Now lets get you to bed."

Kate carried Claire and held on to Aaron's hand, as they walked in to the hotel. Jack soon followed carrying all the suitcases that Kate had insisted on bringing. Once they got to their room Kate changed Claire and put her in bed, and Jack did the same to Aaron.

"Just think in less than eight months we are going to have another little one to put to bed," Jack said with a smile as they closed the door leading to the kid's room.

"I know," Kate, replied with a slight yawn, "I almost doesn't even seem possible."

"Come on lets get you to bed, it's been a long day," He said knowing that she was worn out for the trip.

They made their way to the bed and snuggled up close to each other.

"What do you think we should do tomorrow?" she asked him.

"Well there is a small park right around the corner," he answered, "maybe we can take the kids there."

"I love you," she said.

"I love you too," he replied, "but we need to get some sleep, we can't stay up talking all night."

"I know," she said as she rolled her eyes at him, he was so overprotective of her she felt like she was five again.

"Goodnight," he said as he kissed her forehead.

"Goodnight."

They next morning, the kids woke up around seven o'clock and they couldn't wait to go outside and play. Aaron decided that he had to go get his parents up, so he rushed into their room and jump right on top of their bed.

"Wake up!" he shouted, "It's snowing!"

"Aaron, what are you doing up?" Jack asked him hoping that this was just a dream.

"Claire and I want to go play in the snow," he said, "so it is time for you to get up."

"Okay, I'm up," Jack said, "but keep it down I don't want you to wake up your mom."

"Too late," Kate said as she turned over to face him.

"Sorry mommy," Aaron apologized.

"It's okay baby," she said to him, "Why don't you go watch TV while we get ready?"

"Okay," he said as he ran out to the living room to turn on cartoons.

"Well I guess I better go cook some breakfast," Kate said with a small laugh.

"I will make breakfast, you just go take a shower," Jack told her.

"You don't have to do that," she told him, "I will be fine."

"I know, but I want to," he said to reassure her that this is what he wanted to do.

"Okay," she said as she gave him a small peck on the cheek.

An hour later, they had finished their breakfast and were all dressed and ready to play in the snow. Aaron looked so cute; he had a Spiderman coat and matching snow boats. Claire had on her pink mittens and pink coat, and she even had matching pick snow boots. Kate began to pick Claire up to carry her outside, but Jack insisted they he carry her.

"Here I will take her," Jack said as he took the toddler out of Kate's hands.

"Jack please stop worrying about me," she begged.

"I'm not worried about you, I just want to hold my little princess," he told her.

"Fine, I will hold Aaron," she said as if to show him that she was going to do what she wanted, even without his permission.

"Kate, he is five years old he can walk on his own," Jack said stating the obvious.

"You know sometimes you really bug me," she told him.

"I know, but that's why you love with," he said with a goofy grin.

With that they began to make their way outside, they walked down the hall towards the elevator, and pressed the level one button. Once they reached the lobby, they made their way towards the entrance down and down the front steps. Unfortunately, Kate didn't realize that the steps were completely iced over and as soon as her foot hit the steps she slipped and fell to the ground.

"Kate!" Jack shouted as he ran to her side. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she answered, "Just a little slip, nothing to big."

"I think we should get you to the hospital and have you checked out," he said with his voice full of concern.

"Jack, I'm fine," she reassured him, "I just slipped, I promise I'm okay."

"Okay, if you say so," he said not fully convinced.

"Now come on lets go play in the snow!" She exclaimed.

They played in the snow for a half hour before the kids decided that they wanted to go inside.

"Mommy, can we go inside?" Aaron asked, "I'm cold."

"Of course baby," she replied.

They family of four pack up and began to head back to the hotel. Jack noticed that Kate had a funny look on her face, almost like she was in pain.

"Kate, are you okay?" he asked her.

"Yeah, my back just hurts a little probably from the fall," she said as if it were nothing.

They began to walk into the elevator when a sharp pain hit Kate, almost as if someone was stabbing her with a knife.

"Kate, what's wrong?" Jack asked completely panicked.

"Jack, I think something's wrong," she replied with worry in her eyes. "I think-

Before she could finish those words everything went black and she could hear the faint screams of Jack and the kids.

Authors note: Well there you go the perfect family vacation gone wrong. I hope you guys liked this chapter it took me a while to write it. Please review and let me know what you think. Also, thanks once again for the wonderful reviews you guy's rock. 


	3. Broken

Broken

Authors note: Thanks for the reviews.  I don't own Lost.

It had been an hour since they had arrived at the hospital, and no one could tell Jack what was going on. He had spent the last thirty minutes pacing in the waiting room, hoping for answers, hoping for some good news. He couldn't believe he had let this happen, he should have taken her to the hospital right after she fell, he should have but he didn't.

"Are you Kate's husband?" A voice asked as it snapped him out of his thoughts.

"Yes," he answered, "Is she okay?"

"She is fine," the doctor said, "but she lost the baby."

Jack didn't know what to do, at that moment he felt so empty inside, so guilty that he had let this happen.

"Does she know?" he asked.

"We thought it might be best if you told her," the doctor replied.

"Okay, thank you doctor," he said with a sad smile on his face.

As he and the kids made their way down the hall towards her room he began to think of how he was going to tell her the news. He knew that no matter how he said it, it wasn't going to take away the pain; it wasn't going to bring the baby back.

"Hey," he said as he walked into her room.

"Hey," she said as she saw him standing in the doorway.

"Mommy!" Aaron shouted as he ran to her side. "Are you okay?" he asked her.

"I'm fine, sweetheart I just need to get some rest," she answered.

"Well the doctor said I can go home," she told them, "so lets get out of here."

"Wait," he said as she began to get out of her bed.

"What?" She asked.

"We need to talk," he answered.

"Can't we talk in the car?" she said starting to get annoyed, all she wanted was to get out of the hospital.

"No, this can't wait," he said

"Jack, what's going on?" She asked him her eyes now full of concern.

"We lost the baby," he said as the tears started to fall.

"Jack, that isn't funny," she said.

"I'm not joking," he replied, "We lost the baby."

"Speaking of the baby, I think when we get home we should start on its room." She said completely ignoring him.

"Kate, the baby is gone its never coming back," he said hoping that she would realize that this wasn't a joke.

"Jack, I don't want to argue with you," she said annoyed at the fact that he would play this stupid joke on her.

"Kate, I know this is hard for you but you need to understand that we lost the baby, you can't just pretend that it didn't happen," he said desperately trying to get her to realize that this was happening.

"Jack if you don't want this baby all you have to do is say so, you don't have to make up stupid stories!" She yelled.

"I'm not!" "We lost it, we should have gone to the hospital after you fell but we didn't and now its gone!" He shouted back.

Kate finally realized that this was no joke, that everything he said was true, and that it was her fault they had lost it. She suddenly could feel the tears in her eyes, she had to fight them, she had to keep it together, she couldn't cry in front of Jack.

"Lets just go back to the hotel," she pleaded with him, "I just want to go back to the hotel."

"Okay," he said as he helped her get out of the bed.

The car ride back to the hotel was a long one; Kate didn't speak at all, not even when the kids were talking to her. She just wanted to be alone; she wanted to get away from everyone. She felt so broken inside, so alone. She kept thinking back to when she fell, how Jack had tried to convince her to go to the hospital and get checked out and how she had been stubborn and said no. She wished she could go back to that moment and fix this.

.

Jack knew that things would get better she just needed some time. He knew that her heart was breaking and she was having a hard time coming to terms with what had happened, he wished more than anything he could fix this, but he knew he couldn't. If only he had forced her to go to the hospital then maybe they would still have their baby.

After thirty minutes of driving, they finally reached the hotel. Kate got out of the car and headed inside, leaving Jack to get the kids. As soon as they reached the room, she went straight into their bedroom and locked herself in.

"Kate, are you hungry?" He asked her know that she had to be starving by now.

"Leave me alone!" she shouted.

"Why is mommy so upset?" Aaron asked him.

"Because she lost the baby," Jack said trying to make it as simple for him as possible.

"Is she going to be okay?"

"She is going to be fine," Jack, answered, "She just needs some time."

Three hours later Kate still hadn't come out and Jack was starting to get concerned. He didn't want her to be alone during this time; she needed to be around her family.

"Kate, please let me in," he pleaded with her.

After a few minutes of waiting, the door final opened, revealing a brokenhearted Kate. Her eyes were all puffy, cheeks were tear stained, and her nose was all red.

"Kate, it's okay," he said trying his best to comfort her.

"It's all my fault," she muttered.

"No, it's not anyone's fault these things just happen," he said as he held her tight.

"I want to go home," she whispered.

"Okay, we can go home," he answered.

They began to pack all of their stuff, and then they packed the kids toys and went to the lobby to check out. Once they had checked out they loaded the car, and headed out on the road.

_**This is going to be one long drive home,**_ Jack thought.

Authors note: I hope you guys liked this chapter. Loads of drama coming up, and a familiar face will be showing up soon. Tell me who you think it will be.  Thanks for all the reviews they mean a lot.


	4. Secrets

Secrets

Authors note: Thanks for all the reviews you guy's rock. Only one person guessed the person who is coming back, they will be back in the next few chapters. I don't own Lost.

The four hour trip back home had been the longest four hours of Jacks life, Kate didn't speak the whole time, she refused to even look at him and the kids were upset that she wouldn't even talk to them.

As soon as they reached their house, Kate went immediately into their bedroom and locked the door. She sat down on the bed, trying her best not to cry, but she knew sooner or later she would lose that battle.

How could she have let this happen? She killed her own child, she knew she should have gone to the hospital but she didn't. Jack had been right; he probably hated her right now, he would never forgive her no matter what she did now she could never fix this. Tears began to stream down her face, she could no longer fight it, she began to sob and the tears fell faster, he body began to tremble and she felt more alone than she ever had before.

Jack began to help the kids into the house; he carried Claire and held Aaron's hand as they walked up the driveway. He set Claire down in her playpen and turned on the TV for Aaron, then he made his way into the kitchen towards the phone.

"Hello," the voice on the other end of the phone answered.

"Hannah, it's Jack Shephard," he said, "Do you think you could come over and baby-sit for a few hours?"

"Sure, I will be over in a few minutes," she replied.

"Thanks," he said as he began to hang up the phone.

He slowly began to make his way back into the living room.

"Aaron, Hannah is coming over to watch you and Claire so I need you to be a good boy," Jack said looking at his son.

"Why daddy?" Aaron asked with worry in his eyes.

"Because daddy needs to talk to mommy for a little while," Jack replied his face filled with the same worry.

While Jack waited for Hannah to arrive he decided to watch cartoons with the kids. Thirty minutes later Hannah arrived and Jack greeted her at the door.

"Thank you so much for coming," he told her.

"It was no problem," she replied.

"I hope to be back soon but this may take awhile," he said as he began to walk up the stairs.

"Take all the time you need," Hannah said.

Jack made his way up the stairs and down the hall towards the bedroom he shared with Kate. Upon reaching the door he could hear her sobs and his heart broke for her. He knew that this had been so hard for her, how she blamed herself for everything, and how this was not going to be an easy thing to recover from.

"Kate, please let me in," Jack pleaded as he knocked on the door.

"Just leave me alone," Kate sobbed.

"Kate, I need you to open the door," he said, "If you don't open it I will be forced to break it down."

Kate knew that he was never going to leave so she might as well open the door.

"What do you want?" She asked him trying to act as if nothing was wrong.

"I think we should go get some dinner and talk okay," he said hoping that he could convince her to go with him.

"Okay," she said reluctantly, "just let me get dressed.

"I will meet you downstairs," he said.

Five minutes later Kate came downstairs dressed in jeans and a big baggy t-shirt, he face was all red from crying and her hair was up in a messy ponytail. Jack helped her get her jacket on and the two walked out the door. The drove for thirty minutes, neither one of them said a word until they reached a small restaurant just outside of town.

"Jack, why are we doing this?" Kate asked him.

"Because you can't just lock yourself away from me," he replied, "we can't get through this alone."

"Lets just go in," she replied slightly annoyed at the fact that Jack wouldn't just leave her alone.

Jack nodded and he got out and help Kate into the restaurant. Once they made their way into the restaurant, the waitress help them to their table and got their drinks for them. They sat in silence as they waited for their food, neither one knew what to say. Jack did his best to make conversation with Kate, but she wouldn't even look at him.

An hour later, Jack still couldn't get Kate to talk to him, and what was worse was that she didn't even eat her dinner. They only thing she had done was move her food around and pick at a little.

"Why aren't you eating?" he asked her.

"I'm not hungry," she said.

"You need to eat," he told her, "this isn't going to-

"Going to what Jack?" she interrupted, "Going to bring the baby back!" She shouted.

"That's not what I was going to say," he said trying to calm her down.

"Then what were you going to say?" she asked him as the whole restaurant watched.

"Kate this isn't going to help you get better," he told her, "you have to eat, you have to continue to live your life."

"Just leave me alone!" She shouted as she stormed out of the restaurant.

Jack quickly paid the check and rushed out to find her, hoping that he could get her to calm down. As soon as he got outside he saw her, she was sitting on the sidewalk crying and shaking.

"I'm sorry," she said quietly.

"You don't have anything to be sorry about," he told her as he sat down next to her.

"It's my fault, It's all my fault," she sobbed.

"What is your fault?" he asked confused about what she was talking about.

"I should have listened to you," she began, "after I fell I was in a lot of pain, my back was killing me and I knew that I should go to the hospital."

"It's not your fault," he said as he pulled her close to him, "you didn't know it would happen."

"Yes I did," she said, "I knew something was wrong and I didn't do anything about it."

"Kate, It's not your fault," he told her once again.

"Can we just go home?" she asked him with tears streaming down her face.

"As long as you promise not to lock me out and you will eat something for me," he said.

"I promise," she said knowing that she wasn't going to eat anything for him.

Authors note: Okay so this is just the beginning of Kate's breakdown things are going to get really bad. Don't worry this will have a happy ending I promise. I hope you guys like this chapter. Please let me know what you think.


	5. Lies

Lies

Authors note: Thank you for all the wonderful reviews. Someone from the past is going to return in the next chapter and Kate continues to go down hill.

The car ride home was a long one, neither one of them said a word. Kate wouldn't even look at Jack, she was too ashamed of herself, and she was beginning to wonder if they were going to be okay through all of this. The tears began to fall down her cheeks as she began to think about all the horrible things she had done to him, all the things she had put her kids through.

"Kate, why are you crying?" he asked her softly.

"It's nothing," she answered trying to wipe away the tears.

"Please tell me," he pleaded with her.

"I'm just so sorry for everything I have put you through," she replied.

"You have nothing to be sorry about," he told her as he grabbed her hand. "Please just promise me that you will eat and go back to being yourself again."

"I will," she said hoping that she could convince him that she was fine.

"I love you Kate," he said with a smile.

"I love you too," she said as a sad smile appeared on her face.

As they pulled into the driveway, Kate began to put on a fake yawn, hoping that Jack would think she was too tired to eat. Unfortunately, he still insisted that she eat, but he told her that she could eat in bed while he put the kids to bed. Once she was in the house, she made her way up the stairs, trying to avoid her kids, the last thing she needed was them questioning why she had been crying.

Jack paid Hannah and went straight into the kitchen to make Kate some soup, he knew she had to eat if she ever wanted to get better. Once the soup was done he put it on a tray and made his was to their bedroom, where he found Kate sitting up in their bed staring at the wall.

"I made you some soup," he said as he snapped her out of her thoughts.

"Thanks," she said as she gave him a weak smile.

He handed her the tray, which contained the soup, a glass of water and some medicine to help her relax and get some sleep. She looked up at him with a smile hoping that he would leave her to eat without him breathing down her neck.

"Kate, you need to eat," he told her with pleading eyes.

"I will Jack, I promise," she replied "just trust me."

It took a lot of convincing on her part but he finally left the room leaving her to eat the soup in peace. However, the longer she looked at the soup the more guilty she felt, how could she eat, when her baby would never get a chance to eat, how could she even think about eating after what she had done.

The thoughts raced through her head, she began to feel as though she couldn't breathe, beads of sweat began to roll down her face, and she knew exactly what she had to do next. Slowly making her way out of bed, she peeked her head out of the bedroom door to make sure Jack wasn't coming, once she made sure everything was clear she took the bowl of soup and dumped it in the toilet and flushed it without any hesitation. Once she made sure there was no evidence she quickly made her way back to bed. She had just pulled the cover back over her when she saw Jack enter the room.

"Thank you for eating," he said to her as soon as he saw the empty bowl.

"Your welcome, it was really good," she lied, she felt so guilty about lying to him but he wouldn't understand the truth.

"Did you get the kids to sleep?" she asked him as he climbed into bed.

"Yes they are out like a light," he replied with a slight laugh.

"I love you," she said hoping it would get rid of her guilt that she was feeling at that moment.

"I love you too," he answered her, "but I think we should get some sleep, it has been a long day."

"Yeah, maybe you're right," she said as he turned off the lights.

"Good night," he said.

"Good night," she replied.

An hour later Kate was still wide-awake, the guilt of everything was just too much for her to take. She needed to get out; she needed to talk to someone, someone other than Jack, he just wouldn't understand. She carefully crawled out of bed, making sure she didn't wake Jack in the process and went into the bathroom to change her clothes. When she had finished get ready she made her way down the stairs being as quiet as she could she grabbed her keys and headed out the door.

As she backed out of the driveway she began to cry, she would never have dreamed that she would be doing this to her family, to Jack. She had to drive anywhere, anywhere but here, she began to get lost in her thoughts and she continued to follow the road not knowing where she was going, not knowing what she was doing.

Jacks eyes fluttered open as he heard faint cries coming from Claire's room, he sat up and noticed that Kate wasn't there, he figured that she went to check on Claire so he began to walk down the hall to check on them. Once he reached her room he noticed that Kate wasn't in there, he went over to Claire and picked her up and began to head downstairs to look for Kate.

"Kate!" he yelled, "Kate!"

After searching the whole house he realized that the car keys were gone and he knew that Kate wasn't going to answer.

After an hour of driving around, her cell phone began to ring, it was the call she had been dreading since she left the house; it was Jack. She took a few seconds to think about what she would do, if she ignored it he would end up having a search party looking for her, but if she answered it he would yell at her and tell her to come home. She decided it was better to answer, at least then he would know that she was safe and she could make up some story of why she left.

"Hello," she answered trying not to sound upset.

"Kate, where are you?" She heard Jack voice yell through the phone.

"I was hungry and nothing sounded good so I decided to go to the store," she said hoping he would but this story.

"Why didn't you tell me I would've gone for you," he questioned.

"I just needed some alone time," she snapped, " you are always with me and I just need some space."

"Kate, calm down, what his going on?" he asked her his voice was now filled with worry.

"Nothing, just leave me alone," she replied her voice was beginning to shake.

"Kate please just tell me where you are, I will come get you and we can talk, It will be alright," he said trying to calm her down.

"Good-bye Jack," she said in a whisper as she closed the phone.

Authors note: I know Kate would never act like this, but I've always wanted to write a story where she has some sort of breakdown and she needs Jack to save her. Anyway, I hope you guys like this chapter and please review and tell me what you think.


	6. A Visit With An Old Friend

A Visit With An Old Friend

Authors note: Thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews. I don't own Lost.

"Good-bye Jack," she said as she hung up the phone.

The tears were pouring down her face, he nose was red, and her eyes were puffy. She had to talk to someone, anyone, she began to think of all the people so could go visit. She couldn't talk to Hurley, he would call Jack, Sun just wouldn't understand her, and Sayid would think that she was crazy. After going through the list she finally thought of the one person who might be able to understand her, she had to go talk to Kevin. She began to drive to Kevin's house, she knew it was late but he had told her if she ever needed anything she was always welcome.

Jack hurried upstairs to get Aaron; he had to go find Kate even if it took all night to find her. Once he had the kids ready, he put them in the car and began to back out of the driveway.

He began to call everyone he could think of, anyone that Kate had been in contact with for the past few years.

"Hello," a voice on the other end answered.

"Sun it's Jack, is Kate with you," Jack asked her.

"No I haven't seen her," Sun told him, "What's going on?"

"She just left and when I called her she wouldn't tell me where she was," He said sounding worried and irritated at the same time.

"Do you need me to help you look for her?" Sun asked trying to help.

"No, just please call me if you see or hear from her," he said to her.

"I will," she replied, "Do you want me to call the others?"

"If you don't mind," he said.

"Okay I will call you if I find out anything," she told him as they both hung up the phone.

Sun began to call all of the other survivors, to see if Kate had called them or came to visit them. Unfortunately, she had not been in contact with anyone, no calls, and no visits. They promised to let her know if Kate called them and asked if there was anything they could do. Sun told them to just sit and wait; if Jack didn't find her then they would all go looking.

Kate had been driving for what seemed like ages, when Kate pulled up to Kevin's house. She checked her face in the mirror she had to fix her makeup she didn't want Kevin to know that she was upset. She made her way out of the car and up towards the house, she knocked on the door trying not to start crying again.

"What do you want," Kevin said as he began to open the door, he stopped dead in his tracks when he realized it was Kate.

Kate, what are you doing here?" He asked her completely confused as to why she was at his doorstep at one in the morning.

"Can I come in?" She asked him.

"Sure, come on in," he said as he helped her into the house.

"Where is Libby?" Kate asked him once they had made it into the living room.

"She went to New York for the weekend with some of her friends," Kevin answered her as the sat down on the couch.

"Are you going to tell me what you are doing here or am I just going to have to guess?" He questioned her once again.

"I just had to see you," she answered, "I miss seeing you."

"Kate, what is going on where is Jack?" He asked her knowing that there was something she wasn't telling him.

"It doesn't matter," Kate said with no emotion whatsoever.

"I need you to tell me what's going on," he told her, trying desperately to get her to talk to him.

"I just can't be with Jack anymore," she told him, "I'm not good enough for him."

"Kate, Jack loves you no matter what, he doesn't care if your not perfect," He said trying to comfort her.

"He hates me," she began to cry, "he will never forgive me for what I did."

"What exactly did you do?" Kevin asked her expecting to here the worst.

"I killed our baby," she cried, "I fell down some stairs and I told him that I was fine and that he didn't need to take me to the hospital."

"Kate, he knows that you didn't do it on purpose," Kevin said as he pulled her into a hug.

"He will never forgive me, he will never love me again," she continued to sob.

"Kate, its going to be okay," he said as he pulled back to see her face.

Kate didn't know what came over her, but something about Kevin comforting her made her want to kiss him. She leaned forward and began to kiss him, but she was surprised when he began to pull away from her.

"Kate, this isn't a good Idea," he told he as he stood up.

"Kevin, please I just want to forget everything," she pleaded with him, "I just want to go back to how we use to be."

"It can never be that way," he told her, "we aren't the same people we use to be."

"But can't we just go back, just for tonight?" she asked him her eyes begging for him to just give in.

"No, Kate I love Libby now and you love Jack," Kevin told her.

"But Jack doesn't love me anymore, I need you Kevin," she pleaded once more.

"I'm going to go call Jack, he is probably worried sick about you," Kevin told her as he walked over to the phone.

"Kev, please don't," she begged him, "he won't understand."

"Okay, I won't call him," Kevin said as he set the phone back down. "Why don't you just go lay down and try to get some sleep, he suggested.

Kate curled up on the couch, it took only a few minutes for her to fall asleep, she had been so tired because she hadn't been sleeping since she lost the baby.

Once Kevin was sure she was asleep, he pick up the phone and dialed Jack's number hoping that he would answer.

"Kate, is that you," Jack asked as he answered his phone.

"No, Jack it's Kevin," he told him, "Kate is over here, she showed up at my house thirty minutes ago."

"Is she okay?" Jack asked as he breathed a sigh of relief.

"She is fine," Kevin said, "but she was really upset, and I think you should know that she kissed me."

Jack's heart dropped into his stomach, he felt like he was losing all control, it was like he didn't even know who she was anymore. One minute she was completely fine and the next she was kissing her ex-boyfriend and refusing to eat.

"I will be right over," he said as he snapped out of his thoughts, "thank you for telling me."

"It's no problem Jack," Kevin said to him, "that's what I'm here for."

Authors note: I know you probably hate me for making Kate kiss Kevin but don't worry I promise this is a **JATE** story and it will have a **HAPPY** ending. Hang with me before we can get to the happy ending we have to go through some rough times. Please review and tell me what you think. Next chapter Jack will take Kate home and he will talk to her about the kiss and what is going on with her.


	7. A Long Awaited Talk

A long Awaited Talk

Authors note: Thanks so much for the wonderful reviews, you guys are awesome. I don't own Lost.

"_**She kissed me."**_

Those words had been stuck in Jack's head since he had hung up with Kevin, he couldn't seem to wrap his mind around it. He wasn't sure if he was angry, sad, or both. He knew that she was going through a lot and she probably wasn't thinking about what she was doing. All he wanted was for her to be back in his arms, for her to be happy again, for his family to be whole again.

Thirty minutes later Kevin heard a knock on the door, he knew that it was Jack and that this was not going to be fun. He slowly made his way out of his chair and over to the door, trying to be as quiet as possible so he did not wake up Kate.

"Hey Kevin," Jack said as Kevin opened the door, "thanks so much for calling me."

"Like I said Jack, that's what I'm here for," Kevin replied.

"How long has she been asleep?" Jack asked him as he looked towards her.

"About forty-five minutes or so," Kevin told him with a sad smile.

"What did she say to you?" He asked Kevin hoping that it would give him answers as to what was going on with her.

"She told me that it was her fault she lost the baby, and that you hated her for it." Kevin told him, "I told her that you loved her, but that's when she kissed me and told me she wanted to be with me again." "She didn't mean it Jack, she is just depressed, she just isn't thinking."

"I know," Jack, answered him, "I scheduled a doctors appointment for her for tomorrow."

"I'm glad to hear that," Kevin said as he placed his hand on Jack.

"She hasn't been eating," Jack told him, "I'm really starting to worry about her."

"As long as she had you she will be fine," Kevin reassured him, "you will get her the help she needs." "Just remember that if you need anything, I'm here for you."

"Thanks," Jack said as he gave Kevin a smile.

"I will leave you two alone," Kevin said as he made his way down the hall towards his bedroom.

Jack made his way over to Kate; he couldn't help but notice how beautiful she was when she was sleeping. For the first time in a week she looked peaceful and not upset and out of control. He only wished that he knew what was going on with her, why was she acting like this? What was going on?

"Kate," Jack whispered softly in her ear, "Kate, it me Jack."

"Jack, what are you doing here?" she asked him.

"Kevin called me and told me that you were here and that you were really upset," Jack answered her.

"Jack, please just leave me alone," she said once she figured out what was going on.

He wished that he could just leave her alone and things would all work out, but he knew that by leaving her alone it was only going to get worse. He knew that the best thing to do was to get her help; she needed to talk to someone about what she was going through.

"I can't do that," Jack replied, "I can't watch you do this to yourself."

"I'm fine," she told him, "I don't need you to fix me."

She knew that he was right, that she needed to get help because if she didn't get it soon she was going to have a serious problem, but she didn't care anymore.

"Please Kate, please talk to me," he pleaded with her, "I just want to know what's going on."

"Nothing," she snapped, "nothing is going on."

"So refusing to eat, running away, and kissing your ex-boyfriend is nothing now?" Jack asked her as he began to feel the anger building.

"I have been eating!" She snapped back at him.

"Not much," he told her.

"Why do you care?" She asked him.

"Do you even have to ask that question," he asked her, "I love you, that's why."

"How can you love me after what I did?" she said as she began to sob.

"It's not your fault," he whispered to her as he pulled her into his arms.

"Then why does it feel like it?" She asked through her sobs.

"I don't know," he replied, "but we are going to get through this."

"I don't think I can do this anymore," she said as she brushed the tears away from her face.

"Do what?" He asked unsure of what she was talking about.

"I can't pretend that everything is going to be okay," she replied, "that one day I will wake up and feel whole again."

"Kate it's not going to be easy, but we are going to get through this." He said as he pulled he back into a hug.

"I just want to go home," she said as she pulled away from him her eyes looking hollow and broken.

"Okay, we can go home," he told her, "but tomorrow I think we need to have a doctor look at you."

"No, I'm fine!" Kate yelled at him, "I don't need help, I just need you to leave me alone!"

This was the last straw for Jack, something inside him snapped and he just lost it.

"Kate, whatever you are trying to accomplish by putting everyone through this, you need to stop!" He yelled at her. "Can't you see that we are all hurting, that you are not the only one going through this?" "It's time for you to accept the fact that the baby is never coming back, no matter what you do, you can't change what happened!"

"I'm sorry that I can't be just like you!" She screamed at him.

"I'm not asking you to be, I'm asking you to get help!" he shouted back.

Kate had finally had enough; she slowly stood up and began to make her way to the door. She just couldn't take it anymore she felt so alone, so disconnected from everyone, most of all Jack. She knew that every word that he had said was true, that he loved her and she needed to get help, but the truth was that she didn't want to she didn't want to get better.

"Where are you going?" Jack asked as he began to panic for fear that she was going to run away again.

"I'm leaving," she told him as the tears formed behind her eyes.

"Please Kate, lets just get you some help," he pleaded with her trying to get her to realize that it was going to be okay.

"You can't help me," she whispered as she turned towards the door placing her hand on the handle.

Just as she was about to turn it she felt his hand on hers stopping her from opening the door.

"We can get through this, you aren't alone," he reassured her, "I will be with you through this."

She turned and threw herself into him crying harder than she did before; he put his arms around her and pulled her closer to him whisper to her that it was going to be okay.

"Can we go home?" She asked him once again.

"Yes, but you have to promise not to run from me again." He answered her.

"Jack, I'm so sorry for everything," She apologized, "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," he told her, "I love you and I'm going to get you through this."

Authors note: Thanks for all the comments. Kate is finally going to get some help but her problems are far from over. Please comments and let me know what you think about this chapter.


	8. Getting Help

Getting Help

Authors note: Thanks for the reviews! I don't own Lost. Btw, sorry this chapter is so late; things have been kind of crazy for me. 

"So Kate how are you feeling today?" Dr. Johnson asked her.

"I'm feeling a little bit better," Kate said smiling.

"Jack told me that you have been a little sad lately," he told her, "do you want to talk about it?"

"No I think I'm fine," she said refusing to talk about what was going on with her.

"I think we need to talk about it," the doctor said to her as if he were talking to a child.

"There is nothing to talk about," Kate told him, "I told you I am fine."

"Kate I know that losing the baby was hard on you," the doctor began, "but you can't shut everyone out like this." "You have to continue to live your life, no matter how hard that might be."

"I'm fine," Kate said stubbornly, "there is nothing wrong with me."

"Then why did you run off to your ex-boyfriends house?" He asked her as she began to look away from him.

"I just wanted to see him," she said, "we are still good friends."

"Okay, then why are you not eating?" he questioned hoping to get an answer. "Jack said that you are refusing to eat," he told her.

"I am eating," she lied, "just because Jack doesn't see me doesn't mean that I'm not eating." "Jack is just overprotective," Kate told him, "he is just freaking out, I'm fine."

"Well it looks like our time is up, so I will see you next week," Dr Johnson told he as he began to walk her back out to where Jack was waiting.

"Next week?" She asked him with a shocked look on her face.

"That is when Jack scheduled your next appointment," He told her.

"I don't think I will be needing another appointment," Kate said politely, "I am doing just fine."

"We will let Jack make the finally decision about that," The doctor smiled at her as they finally reached the waiting room.

"Thank you so much Dr. Johnson for taking the time to talk to her," Jack told him as he shook his hand.

"It was no problem," the doctor answered him, "she may try to convince you that she doesn't need to come back, but she does, so don't let her fool you."

"Thanks for the warning," Jack told him as he made his way over to Kate.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked her.

"Yes, I just want to go home," She replied almost in a whisper.

The walk to their car was only ten minutes, but for Kate it felt like an eternity. She couldn't believe that Jack thought she was crazy, he was going to be watching everything she was doing, he was never going to give her space.

"Are you okay?" he asked her as he grabbed her hand pulling her from her thoughts.

"I'm fine," she said as she continued to look out the window instead of at him.

"What's going on?" He asked again not wanting to give up until he got an answer.

"I can't believe that you think I'm crazy," she snapped at him as she pulled her hand away from his.

"What are you talking about?" He asked her a little taken back by how she was acting.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, you make me go see a doctor because I'm a little sad and I'm not eating as much as you want me too!" she yelled at him as she felt the tears began to fall.

"It's not like that Kate," He said trying to get her to calm down, "I just want to make sure you are okay."

"Why because you think something's wrong with me?" She questioned him.

"You just haven't been yourself lately, and I just wanted to help you," He told her.

"I don't need your help," She told him, "I don't need anyone's help."

"You are still going back to see Dr. Johnson," He told her now starting to lose his cool with her.

"You can't make me!" She screamed at him.

"Kate you are going back to see Dr. Johnson," He told her once again trying to get his anger under control. "If it will make you feel better I will go in with you next time."

"Just leave me alone," she whispered.

The rest of the drive home was quiet, Kate refused to even look at Jack, and she continued to look out the window. Inside Jacks heart was breaking, he knew why she was doing this, she was hurt he couldn't blame her for that, but he couldn't figure out why was she refusing help. He knew that if he didn't get her under control soon he was going to have to put her in the hospital for a few days.

He knew that she wasn't eating, the night he fixed her soup he had heard her flush it down the toilet and he knew if he didn't stop this soon she was going to develop a serious eating disorder. No matter how hard she tried to convince him that she was fine, he wouldn't believe her, he knew that this was not his Kate the one he had fell in love with years ago.

When they finally reached the house, Kate made her way to their bedroom and locked the door behind her; she refused to let Jack in no matter what.

"Kate, please let me in," Jack pleaded with her as he stood outside their bedroom, "I'm sorry about all of this."

"Please believe me Jack," She said through her sobs, "I'm not crazy."

"I know, you're not crazy," he told her as he saw the door began to open revealing a sad looking Kate.

"You're not crazy, I just want you to be okay that's why I'm trying to help you." He told her as he pulled her into a hug.

"Okay," she said, "I will get help, I'm going to get better, I promise."

Authors note: Please let me know what you think. Next few chapters Kate is going to hit rock bottom, and then there will be a big turn around. Next chapter Kate eating disorder gets worse and Jack had to make a hard decision about getting her help. Once again sorry for the long wait I hope to have the next chapter up by the weekend.


	9. Putting On An Act

Putting On An Act

Authors note: Thanks so much for all the wonderful reviews. If you haven't read my new story "I Will Come Back" please read it. I don't own Lost.

It had been almost a month since her visit with Dr. Johnson, and Kate was doing everything she could to convince Jack that she was better. She put on a good act, she made sure that she ate in front of him; she would clean her plate, and then when he wasn't watching she would sneak off to the bathroom to empty her stomach. As much as she hated lying to him, she had convinced herself that this was the way it had to be.

She couldn't believe that Jack hadn't said anything to her about her weight loss. After weeks of throwing up, she had managed to lose a lot of weight, and now she looked like a skeleton. She figured he probably didn't want to mention it to avoid upsetting her, he was just happy to see her eat something and act more like her old self.

Tonight was the night; he was going to confront her about her recent weight loss. He knew something was going on, but he couldn't figure it out, she had been eating and even acting a lot better, but something was defiantly going on with her. He knew that this was going to be hard, she would probably deny everything, but he knew he couldn't avoid the situation any longer.

He arrived home to find Kate putting the finishing touches on dinner. He could tell that she was making spaghetti, which she knew was his favorite, so he knew she was trying to butter him up for some reason. Perhaps she knew that he was going to talk to her about her weight, or maybe she was going to convince him that she didn't need to go see Dr. Johnson. Whatever the reason, he was going to play along for now.

"Hey," he whispered in her ear as he wrapped his arms around her small waist.

"Hey, how was work today?" She asked him as she turned around to face him.

"Good," He told her as he planted a kiss on her cheek. "How was your day?"

"Good," she replied, "the kids and I went to the park and played for a few hours."

"Sounds like you had a lot of fun," he said, "I'm so happy that you are feeling better."

"I've been meaning to talk to you about that," She started, "I don't think I need to see Dr. Johnson anymore."

"Kate, you know that's not going to happen," He told her as if she was a small child.

"But Jack, I doing fine," she argued, "I'm happy, I've been eating, I'm doing fine."

"Lets just have dinner and then we can talk about this," he told her trying to avoid a fight before dinner.

They sat and ate their dinner in complete silence, even the kids were quiet, they knew that something was going on with their parents, so they ate their dinner without saying a word. The whole time Kate picked at her food, not want to eat, but when she noticed Jack staring at her she began to eat. After dinner Jack got the kids settled in the living room, he put on a movie for them and then returned to the kitchen to help Kate with the dishes. Once he was back in the kitchen he noticed that Kate was gone, she had been disappearing after dinner for the past few days, but Jack didn't seem to think anything of it, until tonight that is.

Jack made his way up the stairs towards the master bedroom when a faint noise coming from the bathroom caught his attention. It sounded like Kate was throwing up, normally he would have assumed that she had the flu, but with everything that had been going on lately he knew better than that. He made his way over to the bed, sat down and put his head in his hands. How could he have missed this, Kate had an eating disorder. She had put on a good act; he believed that she was actually getting better, when the reality was she was getting worse. He was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the toilet flush and the bathroom door open.

"Jack, what are you doing up here?" She asked him with a surprised look on her face.

"I came to find you," he told her, as he studied her guilty face.

"I'm fine," she told him, as she began to make her way towards the bedroom door.

"We have to talk about this," he told her as he grabbed her arm.

"There is nothing to talk about," she told him.

"You were throwing up," he said, "Why don't you tell me what's going on."

"I'm fine, I just have the flu or something," she said trying to get him to believe her.

"Kate, stop lying to me!" He yelled, "I know what you were doing, you barley touched your food until I started watching you, and then you disappear to the bathroom, to throw up."

"Jack, I'm fine," she said starting to get annoyed with him.

"Kate, I didn't want it to come to this but I'm going to have to put you into the hospital, you have an eating disorder and we need to deal with It." He told her.

"Please Jack, please don't do this to me," she begged him, "I promise I will get better, I will do whatever you want."

"You keep saying that, but you are only getting worse not better," He told her trying to keep from breaking down. "I'm sorry that we lost the baby, but I can't watch you do this to yourself anymore." "The kids need you, I need you, and so I can't just sit back while you slowly kill yourself."

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," she cried, "I can't stop, I just can't."

"I know," he told her as he pulled her close, "that's why I'm going to get you help."

Authors note: Sorry this is really late; hopefully the next chapter will be up by next week but no promises. Only two or three more chapters left. Please review and tell me what you think. Next chapter Kate gets help.


	10. Getting Better

Getting Better

Authors note: Sorry for not updating things have been a little crazy. Please read and review.

The next few day seemed to drag on forever for the Shephard family, the kids hardly saw their parents, when Hannah wasn't watching them they were back and forth between Sun and Hurley. Jack had been to every rehab center in Los Angeles trying to find an opening for Kate, but everywhere he went was completely full. It took a while but he finally found one about an hour away from their house that would take her. It was a small center, but it was nice, she would get three full meals and several snacks everyday. Jack and the kids wouldn't get to see her at all the first week, but after that they could visit her once a day between six and eight every night.

"Kate, are you ready?" Jack asked his wife as he watched her zip up her suitcase.

"Jack, please don't make me do this," she begged him, "I promise things will be different."

"Kate, I'm only doing this because I love you," he told her, "everything is going to be okay."

"I'm so sorry," she told him as she let the tears fall down her face.

"It's okay, your going to be okay," he told her as he pulled her close to him.

"Mommy, where are you going?" Aaron asked as he walked into the room.

"Mommy has to go away for a while, she has to get better," She told him as she bent down next to him.

"When you come back will you be the old mommy?" He asked her, "the one that smiles and plays with me."

"Yes, I will be the old mommy," she answered with a slight laugh, "and I will play with you, read to you and tuck you in at night."

"Good, because I don't like the new mommy, she is always sad," he told her as he threw his arms around her.

"Take care of your daddy and your sister for me while I'm gone," she whispered to him.

"Okay," he said, "I will."

"Kate, it's time to go," Jack told her as he pointed at his watch.

"Okay, just let me say good-bye to Claire," she answered.

After saying good-bye to the kids and thanking Hannah for watching them, Kate made her way to the car. The car ride was quiet, Kate didn't say a word she just continued to look out the window watching the rain pour outside. Jack tried to keep his mind off of the current situation, but after driving for an half an hour he just couldn't take the silence.

"I love you," He said as he glanced over at her.

"I love you too," she told him as a sad smile appeared on her face.

"I promise to bring the kids every night that I can," he said trying to comfort her anyway he could.

"How long am I going to be in there?" She asked him.

"If you do everything you are told then you can be out in a month," He answered with a smile.

"What if I don't do everything I'm told?" She asked him.

"Well, then you will be in there for a long time, but I know you and I know that you love your family enough to do the right thing." He told her trying to stop the fight that was about to happen.

"I do love you guys, but I don't know if I love myself enough to do it," She told him.

"You may not love yourself, but there are two wonderful kids back home who love you and want to see you happy again," he told her, " and that's how I know your going to be okay."

"It's only a month, I can do this," she said feeling a strength from inside her that she hadn't felt in a long time.

"Now your sounding like the old Kate," Jack told her as a smile appeared on their faces.

"We are here," Jack said as he pulled into the parking lot.

"I'm going to get better, I'm going to be okay," she said trying to convince herself.

After he got her checked in, they went to her room and unpacked her suitcase. Finally an hour later she was all settled in, she had even had a little dinner. It wasn't a lot, but it was defiantly something. The time had come for Jack to say his goodbyes, it took fifteen minutes but he finally was able to leave her. He promised that he would be back in a week and that he would bring the kids.

"I will be back next week," Jack told her as he held her in his arms.

"I know," she said as she pulled away from him, "I love you."

"I love you too," he told her as he made his way out the door.

As he made his way to the car he felt a peace; like for the first time in a long time, he knew that everything was going to be okay.

Authors note: I know this was short, but it's better than nothing. Please tell me what you think. Only two more chapters, and hopefully they will be up soon.


	11. Chapter 11

Authors note: I have decided to finish this story and I am working on the final chapter. I am hoping to have it up by the weekend. Please check out my new story "Don't Dream It's Over" and let me know what you think. Thank you guys so much for being so patient with me and this story. It has not been easy writing this because I lost interest in it halfway through. I will finish it because I owe it to you guys and I hate it when people don't finish stories that I like. Anyway, final chapter is halfway done and will be up by the weekend. Thanks for all the support!


	12. Moving On

Moving On

Authors note: So sorry that this hasn't been updated in forever. Anyway this is the last chapter. Please review and let me know what you think.

One month later…

Kate had made so much progress within the last month, she almost felt like a completely new person. She had had so many meeting about how to deal with eating disorders and how to deal with tragedy. She had determined going into rehab that she would do whatever it took to get better for her family. Now as she waited for Jack to pick her up, she felt like she was ready to move, ready for a fresh start.

"Hey," Jack said as he greeted her with a kiss. "I have missed you so much."

"I've missed you, too," She told him as she hugged him.

"Are you ready to go home?" He asked her with a smile.

"I've been ready for a month," she said with a laugh.

Jack had missed her laugh. For the first time in months she was laughing, she was smiling, and she looked alive again. He missed that so much. He knew in his heart that this was the beginning of the rest of their lives. Kate made her way into the car, while Jack put her suitcase in the back seat. Once he made sure he got all of her stuff and that Kate was buckled up, he began to drive back to their house.

"The kids have missed you so much," Jack told her as he took her hand in his.

"I just hope they can find it in their hearts to forgive me," She said as she hung her head down.

"They know that it's not your fault," Jack reassured her, "They are just going to be happy to have their mom back."

After what seemed like hours, they finally arrived at home. Kate couldn't feel her legs, so was so nervous about the reaction of her kids. Would they still love her? Would they forgive her? She knew that they would, but she couldn't help but worry.

"Aaron! Claire! Mom is home!" Jack called to them as they entered the front door.

"Mommy!" Aaron and Claire shouted as they came running towards Kate. Hannah followed behind them smiling at the nice family reunion that was taking place.

"Hey guys," Kate said as she bent down and gave them a hug.

"Mommy we missed you so much!" Aaron said as he pulled back from the hug to look at her face to face.

"I missed you guys, too." Kate replied trying to hold back the tears that had began to form in her eyes.

These were not tears of sadness, but rather tears of joy. She had missed her kids so much. Sure they had come to visit her in rehab, but it was different. They were only allowed to visit for thirty minutes because the doctors had thought that would be best for her. Jack had been allowed to visit for two hours each day, but that still wasn't enough time. She had missed her family, plain and simple. She missed cooking dinner for them, tucking the little ones in bed each night, and snuggling up to Jack before dozing off to sleep in his arms. She missed the daily routine of making breakfast, taking Aaron to school, and doing to daily cleaning while Claire was taking a nap. She missed being a mom. Even before she went to rehab she missed that. Things had been so crazy for the past few months. But now it was time for a fresh start.

Three months later…

Jack awoke to a very familiar sound. It was not a sound he wanted to hear, especially not coming from the master bathroom.

The past few weeks had been very stressful for him. Kate had seemed a little off. He knew something was up. All he could think about was Kate slipping back into her depression and that is exactly what he was beginning to think was wrong with her. Every time he would try to talk to her about something, she would start crying. This was exactly how it started last time. It was crying, refusing to eat, and then throwing up what little she did eat.

He slowly made his way over to the bathroom door and pressed his ear against the door. She was doing it again, throwing up. He wondered what was causing her to start this again. Had he done something to upset her? He decided that now was as good of a time as any to confront her about what she was doing.

"Kate," he whispered as he began to know on the door.

When he didn't receive an answer he decided it was time to open the door. Thankfully he had taking the lock off, so she couldn't lock herself away from him.

He opened the door only to find her sitting on the floor next to the toilet. She was wiping her face with a wash cloth, and her face looked pale white.

"Oh, Kate, why are you doing this to yourself?" Jack questioned her, his voice full of heartache. "Did I do something to upset you?"

"No," she answered, "I-" she started to say when Jack interrupted her.

"You are not going to do this again." He scolded her. "In the morning I am going to take you to your therapist. I can't have you like this. I won't let you hurt yourself again."

"Jack, I am not hurting myself." Kate said with a slight chuckle.

"Then what would you call it?" He asked getting irritated with her.

"I call it morning sickness." She said as she grinned from ear to ear.

"We're having a baby?" Jack's voice softened and his lips began to curl up into a smile.

"Yes, we are." She said as he hugged her tight, kissing her on top of her head.

At that moment, everything was at peace, everything was perfect. They were going to be okay because Kate situation had only made them stronger. In eight months, they would welcome a new addition to their family. This was it, their fresh start, their new beginning.

Author's note: Thank you guys for reading this fanfiction. So sorry that it took me so long to complete it, I was suffering from writers block. Please leave a review to let me know what you think. Also, I was thinking about doing a sequel, so I would love to hear your thoughts and ideas. Please check out my new story "It Ends Once". Thanks again for the support. You guys rock!


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